Finish it or ditch it!
When Kat was told her job was being downshifted from full-time to part-time over a year ago, she began making plans. The change—not unexpected—allowed her time to launch her own business, something she’d dreamed about for years. She made a few professional connections with others in the field. She designed a plan for her website. But that’s where she stopped. She still talks about “getting the website up” but given how long she’s stalled on the project, I suspect she’ll never launch her site or her business.
Kat is not alone. And if we’re honest, we can look at our own lives and see all the ideas and projects we’ve started, planned on completing, but eventually let languish in the twilight of “someday.” Someday we’ll finish that piece of music we began learning. Someday we’ll market our business or have that difficult conversation we’ve been avoiding. Someday we’ll clean out the house/garage/our psyches and move one. We’ll do it all someday.
There are few things more draining than unfinished tasks or plans. We push them aside, tell ourselves we’ll do it tomorrow or the next day, but we never do. Meanwhile, those plans syphon off our energy. They drain our motivation to start new things or to create the mental and physical space to wait for whatever may be coming next. We remain stuck in limbo—not completing what needs to be done but not letting go of it either.
January, with all of its new year energy, is a perfect time to address all the unfinished projects in our lives. This involves pulling every “someday” task and dream out of the future and looking at it through the lens of the present. Thankfully, with a little time and thought, we can free ourselves of the hold these things have on our attention and energy, allowing our creativity and focus to go into things that truly matter to us.
Whenever life becomes cluttered with half-done projects, I find it helpful to step back and reassess what I’m doing by grabbing pen and paper and asking myself the questions I explore in this post. Sometimes the answers surprise me, but I always gain clarity to discern what I want to finish and what needs to be discarded. Maybe you’ll find these questions helpful for you as well.
What’s unfinished?
Make a list of every half-accomplished project and delayed task. Be specific. Include every aspect of your life, not just what’s happening at the piano. We can’t finish or drop projects or ideas that we’re not willing to acknowledge.
What task isn’t mine?
Dispassionately study the list and first ask yourself this question: are all of these projects mine to do or am I taking on another’s task? Good news! If you find things on that list that belong to others, delegate it, cross it off and let go of it.
What drains me?
As you read the remaining items on your list, run them past your gut. Identify the ones that don’t excite you. If they’re not necessary, cross them off immediately. If they truly need your attention, schedule when and how you will finish them and then work your way through them diligently and as quickly as possible. In my experience, I gain energy each time I accomplish an essential task I’ve been avoiding doing.
What excites me?
This is the fun part! Now that you’ve rid yourself of all the tasks that don’t belong to you, as well as dropped or finished the ones that drained you, you’re free to channel all your energy and focus towards what excites you. Be honest with yourself. No one can build a rich, intentional life on a foundation of denial. Sometimes we hang on to an unfinished project because someone else told us it would be a good thing to do. Others may have wise advice, but if it doesn’t ring true for us, we owe to ourselves to stop doing it.
Asking ourselves these questions is rarely a one-and-done activity. In my own life, I find it’s good for me to revisit them when I start feeling overwhelmed by tasks and projects big and small. The clarity and freed energy I experience through sorting out what matters from what doesn’t always gives me the enthusiasm and focus to work on and finish the things that truly belong to me. Best of all, I no longer feel fragmented and scattered. And that, for me, is the best place to build a rich, intentional life that truly reflects my values and abilities.
Photo by Eden Constantino, courtesy of UpSplash